for my boyfriend Jon <3
I have never felt like this . So completely and utterly insane . I feel like my body wasn’t mine . Like my hands , my mind , my emotions weren’t mine . I have never felt like this ever . And I have never been so afraid of myself . Afraid that I would end my life , I never want to die . I demolished my arm , its covered in scratches and blood . But how do I explain this ? This insanity to someone else … to a doctor … to my family . I need help I know I need help . But how do I do it ?